Kenyan female destiny...

Dear friends,

Today we would like to introduce you to one of our friends (sharing the bedroom with us). Her name is Matrine, she is 31 years old and has a 6 year old daughter called Sally (also sleeping in our bedroom).

Matrine is the 4^th born of 10 kids, mother and father being farmers with little income. 

In Kenya, the first eight years of education are free and as she passed with very high marks, she got invited to study at secondary level at different schools. However, due to lack of money, she had to choose the school with the lowest fee. Even though she was one of the best in class, there was no chance for her or her parents to cover for the university fee.

She went off to Nairobi and found a job packaging pharmaceutical products for sail. She worked for several years before the company run out of money and couldn’t pay her more. So she went back home to support her parents looking after the cattle. 

She stayed with her parents for five years, not knowing what future would bring. She had no income and survived by selling self made sweets. After 5 years with no vision for the future, she met her future husband that promised to take her to university. So she went off with him, took care of his 5 children and soon became Sally, a girl in love with life.

Soon her marriage turned out to be a disaster. No promises were kept, Matrine stayed behind in the house looking after the 6 kids not knowing where her husband was spending the nights. She tried to be a loving wife and a caring mother (even to the 5 kids of the previous 5 women), however, the husband didn’t appreciate.

The situation became unbearable, when she found out that her husband had several children even younger than Sally. Through the continuous cheating of her husband, Matrine felt lonely, useless and worthless. She left without knowing where to go.

Kenyan culture implies wifes leaving their husbands to be spoiled. They are being considered as outcasts in the society, even by their family members. Matrine was ashamed of going back to her family, not being able to offer anything to support the family. 

As we mentioned in earlier blogs, girls are not valued as kids but as being somebody’s future wife. This was Matrine’s luck as she was able to take her daughter with her when she left. A boy would automatically have stayed with the father as they belong to them. He didn’t care about girls…

On her search for a better future, she met the head teacher of CBSM. Seeing her loving nature and the care for kids she offered Matrine a voluntary position as assistant teacher at the CBSM school. Matrine happily accepted as this gave her the opportunity to educate Sally.

But just as the situation seems to improve, another stroke hit her: her daughter Sally fell of the bunk bed and needed several stitches in the hospital. Even during this time, Sally’s father didn’t care for his daughter.

Sally is feeling fine and back at school. Even though she missed a term due to her stay in hospital, she managed to become number one in class.

We have been living closely together with Matrine and Sally for the past two weeks. We have experienced her as a caring mother and a hard working woman. A kind of mother every child wishes for.

Doesn’t that sound like a person you would wish the best for her future?

However, Kenyan culture inhibits this woman to prosper:

• She has a daughter that will prevent her from finding a new love as man would never accept a wife with a girl
• Her financial situation does not allow her to gain a higher education despite the good grades received at school
• The lack of education will make it hard for Matrine to find a well-paid job that will sustain her and Sally

We are very touched by this story as it represents the suffer of an “inbetween” generation. She is fighting the “old” Kenyan culture whereby women are suppressed and have little / no rights. She is strong for Sally and future generations to have a better life.

As both, Matrine and Sally became incredible important to us, we would love to support their fight for a better Kenya. We are looking into the possibility of offering her an education to become a trained teacher. First investigations showed that the education would cost around 2000 Euros for two years.

Matrine couldn’t stop crying when we told her that we are looking into possibilities to help her.

Matrine’s story represents the pain many women in the “inbetween” generation are going through.

Let us be thankfull for our free European woman culture and independence.

All the best,

Alex & Alex